Friday, May 16, 2014

I might be the worst

Well there is no doubt it is wedding season.  It's of course typical for weddings to take place in the Spring and Summer, and when you're between 25 and 35, it's even more typical.  I actually had the weddings-every-month-streak in my early 20's (if I were one of those people that "hashtag" I might include a little #ChristianPeopleProblems).

This Spring has a different focus for me these days. I seemed to have skipped some steps somewhere and here I am in....PROM season.

I've referenced my love for prom dress shopping before, so in no way am I looking for sympathy.  However, don't underestimate how terrible it is to think about your kid going to a Post-Prom party. But hey ya gotta let 'em live...and trust that they won't drink any Zima or Mike's Hard Lemonade.

What is actually the most terrible thing about Prom season....this:

Teen’s Tan For $10 

Yep.  If you're under 17, we'd like to get you HOOKED on tanning!  We'll even give you a pack of Virginia Slims on the way out just to make sure you're really on the right track!'s my big, terrible, bloggy confession: Last year I let Kid #1 get a spray tan for Prom.  That's right, SPRAY tan, no cancer-causing UV's like we all did in High School, just good 'ol orange dye. Kid #2 also suffers with the repercussions of "track tan" so how could a Mommo say no? I figure spending $35 on such a luxury would be a crime....So I'm gonna go ahead and humor this inappropriate deal (and "Naked" tanning salon) and pay a mere $10 instead.  Of course I'll slip Kid #2 the cash to hand over, since she'll be the one whose ID says 1996 under birth year. 

I may or may not have printed this online deal out (at work) and stuck it in my purse to ensure this deal goes through. God forbid more than just ten of my hard earned dollars support such a thing.  

I might be the worst.

Friday, May 2, 2014

What seems to work

Never (ever) would I post something about parenting that was titled "How to..." or "The best way..."  I know better than to make such claims, and I know that I really don't know anything at all. Instead, today I'll share what seems to me, to be working (not even Haters can hate on that).

Relatively recently I became a "Mommo" to two teenagers. I really should say I grew into being their Mommo, since it surely didn't happen over night (it was more like a week. JK) Odd to "become" a parent to teens, especially as a spry sub-30 year old. It's a long story and one that not even this blonde could make short. What I will say is that my two girls were made to end up mine and over time God has taught me how to properly be theirs. Always a work in progress...

With the killer insights of my patient and thoughtful husband, and just a dash of female instinct, some house rules have been established, that seem to be working for us in raising our teenies.

In no particular order...
When your teenage daughter brings around a boyfriend- make sure to mess his name up just slightly. Go ahead and throw a "Hey Mick" out there when Mike enters your living room. Let him sweat a little, it's good for them both to stay humble about their "Love's" place in your home. It will eventfully make sense to Mick (why you call him by a different name, that is) and he'll respect you for it. If your Mick can't handle a little humor and humility...well I don't know if Mick should be hangin' around.

Play it off. Tonight I started writing this post on our iPad, before breaking for dinner. Youngest dot picked it up to embark on some college stuff afterward and low and behold my first paragraph was exposed. She quickly handed it to me to save, or log off, or something...with a smirk on her little face.  That's what smart little teens do- they smirk. I could make it a big deal or even say nothing at all while logging out and her curiosity would absolutely lead her to the "web history" later in the evening.  Instead I casually say, "Oh I don't care if you read my blog." And...scene. She has no interest in my blog at all. Sinchy right?

Remember that awesome thing your mom used to do? Do that! One of my very favorite things I did with my mom throughout high school was going dress shopping before dances. She made it a huge deal. We would bypass West Covina Plaza (Respect to those of you that can respect that shout out) and drive out to Brea Mall, now that's big time. We certainly weren't above malls off the 10 West, but Mom knew heading into a different county meant finding a unique dress and having a special day together.  She loved the process of finding the dress, the shoes, the clutch and the jewelry just as much as I did. So OF COURSE some 10 (maybe 15) years later my girls get dance-shopping-and-lunch-marathon-day too! Duh. And I completely get why it was something my mom looked forward to and saved up for- Because it's awesome, that's why! *Our tradition differs slightly as I've implemented a rule that they have to try something on that I chose...and it's usually something ridiculous and hilarious.  I like it.

Gently make fun of other kids with them. What? Yea we do that. And our kids like it. It's probably not nice but we keep it harmless... Like calling those Indian brothers that our girls run track with "The Twindians."  Nobody is getting hurt by that right? And our kids know that somebody is paying attention. (I told you, I only claim what works for us)

Just listen to their stories. All teenage girls want to do is TALK and from my very hands-on research, that just about covers most of their emotional needs on a daily basis. Do I want to know how every single one of their friends got asked to Prom? Not necessarily. But I know now! Better than not knowing, I'm sure. Side note: that whole scene has gotten way out of control. We try to remind our girls of this and help them keep some perspective (for crying out-loud). Being asked to a dance does not need to be on the same level as being proposed to.  I dunno...maybe have something in life you're looking forward to, instead of trying to make a production. of. everything! That's my rant to all teenagers around the world.  Okay maybe just American teenagers. I guess us adults fall into this trap sometimes too...I won't share examples, that would be offensive.

I have just a couple more (okay, a lot more but too many on the list and I start to sound like a know-it-all). I'll leave one more, short and sweet:

Affirm affirm affirm. I need it.  You need it.  Teenagers need it.  Even if yours are acting like little jerks, find something to affirm. "Hey there...nice job hanging up your towel." If you're like me your natural response to a towel hanging is OF COURSE you are expected to and should hang up your towel.  How else should one live?!  Then you remember what seems to work...affirm.

Love to you and all the teens you know.  And Bless your HEART if you're raising some right now.