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MiraLax

What did you do on this beautiful, Spring afternoon?

Oh me? (answered a totally hypothetical individual) Well, I purchased some MiraLax. Just a typical day. MiraLax is a laxative for those of you that aren't in the know...and/or don't have bowel issues.

After a week of stomach problems, this is what it has come to. Shoulder to shoulder with other elderly women in Isle seven of Rite aid. All generously throw out smiles. I mean really, without a good BM in your life, a smile from a stranger goes a long way...I'd imagine.


It's amazing how much attention one will give to creating an environment for this natural (yet sometimes supplementally simulated) action to occur. Some even stay home from their occupations, on Friday afternoons? Like text messages are sent...

"Yea I can come over in about an hour. Gotta pick up the laundry, run a quick errand and wait for this laxative to do its thang."

(This sort of message should clearly be sent out in the form of a "bulk text" to all the eligible bachelors in ones phone) There's a lot more where that came from...meaning the pure gold dating advice-duh.


In the interest of true professionalism, the real bound-up-broad inspiring this post will remain anonymous.

Comments

Rowdy said…
i have crohns, so i feel the mythical object of your post's pain.
May 1, 2010 at 8:52 AM
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