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Sonic the Hedgehog


I went to a small, tiny really, Christian university where everyone knows everyone. This means that even if you don't know someone's name, which normally I do because I have a freakishly good memory, you at least recognize their face. I mean c'mon how many times can you walk past a face on "Caf Lane" without eventually being able to recognize it again shopping at Target?

There are inevitably cliques that form at a small school like this. There are the partiers, the athletes (which tend to overlap with each other), the super spiritual (you lead the homeless ministry and play the guitar in "chapel band", we all get it!), the dude-bros ("dude...bro!" Our school sits on the cliffs of amazing surf, 'nuf said), the over-involved (I mean, isn't ASB supposed to end after high schoool?) etc etc. I didn't really fit any one particular group, mostly just dabbled in a few from time to time and unfairly judged the rest.

Because of the recognizable face/small clique factor, I have reasonable evidence to believe that Sonic the Hedgehog knows who I am and is pretending not to.

I know that this sounds ridiculous. Let me back up. Although I really didn't partake in the party scene in college, I dabbled, like I said, and ended up at a total of 2 "sinful gatherings" (one of which I was turned into authorities for, long story). I also held tightly a hand-full of college gal pals who did partake in the par-tays. All that to say, people know people who know people...catch my drift? At a school of this size, in a scene of this magnitud, if you've been to one bash, you know everyone else who has!

Now, as an alumnis of over 3 years, I work as a beach server (there went my pride by the way). Did I mention it's just a summer job? Anyway, many young folks like myself, most a lot younger actually, work there too. I immediately recognized one young guy, notice I did not say young man! My friends and I always called him Sonic, although we know his name. If you played Sega in the 90's you have a pretty good idea of what this young man's hair do looks like. Take a moment to picture it. So, Sonic and I have made eye contact, exchanged friendly smiles and I've run through all of the connections between him and I in my head...more than once to be certain, just in case we chat. "Let's see...he made out with my asian friend that one time." "Oh yea, and my other friend, that other time." "And hey, didn't his best friend get that one girl pregnant?!" Classy dude. Over the employee salad bar one afternoon I threw it out there, "Hey, you're a Point Loma kid!" This is my way of being casual yet friendly. PLNU boys get overwhelmed very easily by females, especially outgoing ones. His aloof response (He's so cool) "Yea. You go there too?"

"Yup."

I thought it would end there. The polite thing for him to have done 1) pretend you at least recognize me, I mean come on I'm wearing a name tag for crying out loud 2) Say something like "Aren't you friends with...?" People love connections Sonic! At least I do. or 3) Say anything other than what you just did. No....I didn't go there. I just know that YOU went there. DUH.

Just like any hedgehog would, he dug his hole even deeper with...

"Are you still going there?"

(long pause)

"Nope."

Let's do the math for a moment. If I were a freshman in 2002, 7 years ago (with YOU!) and I were still going there, let's see, that would make me a really SUPER senior now wouldn't it!?! Unless you are high right now, very likely, there is no reason for your lack of manners or math skills!

Enjoy your salad!

Comments

stephanier said…
hahaha i love your entries... I laughed through this entire one....
Rowdy said…
u need to submit this guys pic to www.hotchicskwithdouchebags.com

im sure he is over qualified...
Heather said…
a) i REALLY want to know who this is...
b) are you sure he ISN'T a super duper senior... i mean... his mental and social skills clearly do not omit the possibility...

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