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Things to Do

So tonight at job #2 my busser buddy and I found a piece of paper on a table (which by the way is normally super annoying. We're supposed to clean up your food and linen napkins, not all the trash you just cleaned out of your purse). The top of the paper said "Things to do." Instead of throwing it away we thought we'd have some fun. I definitely don't remember the entire list, although I did read it aloud at the end of the night to the bartender and 2 barflies still standing, we all died! I thought I'd share some highlights here with all of you.

We'd jot a few more down in between taking orders and running food out, then yell to eachother "Hey I just wrote 2 more....read 'em...they're funny!"

"Things to do:"

prostate exam
go to Circuit City
spank some little boys
wash my underwear
Cialis
purchase some crack cocaine
bus table 57
buy Preparation H creme
find out Sara's "inside source"
bone out
open a sweat shop-find some Asians
eat a lamb shank
kill Jim (the sassy male bartender)
take Rex to the vet
Buy more Preparation H
stop sweating...

Don't you wish I could be YOUR server?!
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